I miss my Grandma Clare Mae
My maternal grandmother was one of my dearest friends and one of my biggest fans. She was just the coolest. It was funny, because, we were so different, but, no matter what – she loved me fiercely. No matter what whacked out, goofy ideas I came up with – she loved me. Her acceptance of me was incredible. This is hard to write. I’ve been missing her like crazy lately. It’s not just that it’s been Christmas, because, every holiday season that she’s been gone hasn’t been like this. She did visit me in a dream lately and it was so intense. She was hugging me and she just would not let go. (There’s no crying in blogging, Lisa!) Yeah, ok – pulling myself together, really – I am. I’m cool.
369-6765 That was the first phone number I ever memorized, and the first phone number I ever called by myself. 369-6765 That number will be in my head (no crying!) forever.
I keep ‘pieces of Grandmamom’ all around me at all times, often even wearing her watch. Everywhere I look in my house, there is a part of Clare Mae. In my kitchen, I have her beautiful milk glass lamp. Isn’t it pretty? (I know, a lot of people really detest these – I don’t care.)
One of my favorite things of hers that I have is her train case. Such a lovely reminder of a different time, you know? It’s an American Tourister. Isn’t it so pretty?
And you know what’s super cool? I just discovered, that, apparently – train cases are coming back in fashion! A girlfriend and I went into a little boutique here in town, and they had the cutest modern, but old-fashioned, train cases! It was really cool – it was the perfect mix of old and new. And I absolutely love that they are coming back in style!
Gawd, I miss her, though! Sometimes it feels as if she died this morning, it hurts so bad. She passed away, though, on December 9, 1996. Three weeks after my daughter, Sammie Clare Mae, was born.
I just can’t wait to get to Heaven so I can hug her again. I love life, I love being alive, but, I am so looking forward to seeing her again!
(And I’m not crying! I swear! There’s no crying in blogging!)
My Momma Joe just died last week and I miss her really bad. I am sad over your loss, but happy to hear that you love her so much!
I’m so sorry for your loss, Fiber Maiden!! I’ll keep you in my thoughts and prayers!
I googled “I miss my grandma,” simply because I was just thinking about the perfume she used to wear. I stumbled upon your blog. My grandma was the coolest too. She surfed the internet and watched Direct TV until the day she unexpectedly passed away. I’m sorry for your loss. Maybe our grandmas are hanging out together somewhere out there.
What a sweet and wonderful comment, Shelly! Thank you!
I did the same as Shelly, googled “I miss my gran”. Because I do, oh so much. I’m 20 and she died somewhat peacefully from cancer… in a Marie Curie Hospice. She was an inspiration, I have inherited a load of makeup and creams from her, they make me realise we had the same skin and the same tastes in tacky sparkly things… (I knew that haha!) I have her bed now, I am wearing her wedding ring. She died about 3 weeks ago and sometimes I want to go with her. But mostly I just want her back.
Grans are wonderful, they’re like another mother. Mine was.
I miss my grammie too. She died Sept. 3, 1991. Thankfully, it was quick and she probably didn’t even know it was happening. She was 82. This week I lost her wedding ring. I can hear her telling me not to worry about losing a “thing”, but she always wore it, so I wore it because it’s as close as I could get to touching her, and now it’s gone.
Jenna OMG, I totally missed your comment here – I’m so sorry!!! I’ll be emailing you tomorrow, for sure!!!
Ann Heartbreaking, totally heartbreaking. I’m so sad for you, and my Grandma would be saying the same thing. (Well, the one this post is about – the other was a sentimental packrat like me! Ha!)
I’m so very sorry and I do hope you either find it or get some peace about it. Thank you for reaching out to me. Connecting with other people who felt so strongly about and were so close to their grandmothers, too, has been a wonderful unexpected result of this post.
It is truly heartwarming to connect with you about our precious, wonderful grandmas and I’m just willing to bet they had a ‘hand’ in it.
I’ll talk to my grandma about your grandma’s ring. {{{{Ann}}}}
I also searched “I miss my grandma” on google and came on your site. I found out yesterday that my grandmother had passed away in her sleep due to cancer. She was 88. I wasn’t sure exactly how I was supposed to react, being this is the first time I’ve ever lost someone so close in my life. She was the one who took care of me and my siblings while my parents went to work. She was the only reason why I learned to speak Thai (because she didn’t speak English). Now I plan on learning it so that I can read and write it. Although I still didn’t speak her language as well as I should have, our relationship was so great.
I am just so upset right now because I can’t see her. She was staying at a nursing home in Bangkok, Thailand (she is originally from there but has spent a considerable amount of time in the U.S., and got her U.S. citizenship back in 2004). My sister and I did get to see her one last time back in September of this year when the doc said she had 3-6 months left. We were heartbroken to hear that news.
It’s hard…I cried myself to sleep last night. I’m just glad that she is no longer feeling any pain. I miss you grandma and I can’t wait to see you again.
“Do not fear any of those things which you are about to suffer… And you will have tribulation… Be faithful until death, and I will give you the crown of life.”
-Revelation 2:10, Proverbs 15:23,30
Like others I searched ‘I miss my grandma.’ I love your lamp. I also have my Grandma’s knick-knacks around the house. I have a little porcelain windmill I bought for her in Holland. When you spin the windmill it makes little clanks. I used to spin it at least once when I would visit her. Now sometimes I spin it every time I pass through my kitchen.
Grandma was my favorite human and the truest giver of unconditional love. I was very giving of my time with her and we hung out often. She was poor her whole life but surrounded by loving family members until the day she died.
Help us all to heal and understand
Because, we don’t know why you had to leave.
I can only guess it was time for you…
to be free.
To ascend to a broader more wonderful life than this
I believe you’re in a better place now.
A place where only beautiful souls will hold…
you.
The Murmurs
Hi,
I also googled “i miss my grandma” and came in here. My grandma passed away last night and i miss her a lot.
Wow – you guys are awesome, totally awesome! I love all of this outpouring of love for our grandmothers and how they’ve brought us together here! Perhaps I need to do some more posts about my grandmas!!
I searched “I miss my grandma” and found your blog. I’m 33 and live in the house my Big Mama and Big Daddy used to live in. Big Mama died when I was 10-23 years ago-wow… I miss her still. What a fabulous person. Loving, an amazing teacher, wonderful cook. Your grandmother was Clare and mine was Clara. They are always a part of us-forever.
Hi Abbie! Thank you so much for visiting and reading this post! I’m 38 and lately I’ve been feeling like my Grandma just died last week – I’ve been soooo sad, missing her. She passed in 1996 – maybe I said that in the post, can’t remember… Anyway, I’m just saying, like you – it’s been plenty of time – but, it still sometimes feels so fresh.
I actually had both of my grandmothers visit me in a dream last night, so your commenting on this post today is just more acknowledgment to me from them! I’m so happy you dropped in here!
And check this out!!! My grandma was named after her mother, …..wait for it ….. Clara!!!!!! Are you in tears yet? Cuz I am….
Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing with me! Much <3 to you!!!
My Grandmother passed away a little over a week ago from a ten year battle with cancer. I was in the room and I have never felt so sad in my entire life. Gladys was the best grandmother anyone could have asked for. I was so lucky to have her.
I googled I miss my gram and am so glad I was directed here! My gram was the most loving, loyal, understanding, funny, classy lady in my life. She taught me so much. Hers was the first phone number I had memorized as a child and called regularly. I was in awe of her because she was the only person who could scold my mother! I am 27, and she just passed away this March 23rd. My heart aches for her. She was always there, to gently direct me. Keeper of all my secrets. She was 73, and it was a combo of illnesses she died from. She said I was her guardian angel and her favorite. When I get sad, I think of how lucky she was to live such a wonderful life. She got to see 10 grandchildren grow, and even had almost 5 good years with a great-grandchild (my daughter). Someone once told me that when people close to you pass, there are signs all over. I’m searching and searching for them. Thank you for your blog!!
Wow, I too googled “I miss my grandma” and was directed to this site. Thank you for your words it somehow helps the heart a little to know that others have the same hurts about their grandmas. I lost my grandma about 3 years ago and I miss her everyday. Some days the pain is still raw. My grandma was like a second mother to me. She loved me, cared for me and helped raise me into the woman I am today. Last night I had a dream she was still alive and when I woke up I was so excited to go see her and tell her about everything that has been happening in my life. It was a horrible shock once I fully woke up and realized that it was only a dream.
I am getting married in a few months and I would give anything to have her physically there. I know that can not happen so I will have to pray that she is able to watch over me and see her granddaughter get married (which I am almost positive that she thought would never happen because she didn’t think anyone could put up with my stubbornness….ha ha I found someone
I wish that all of us who miss our grandmas terribly can find inner peace and keep the memories of our greatest loved ones strong in our mind! Thank you again for what you wrote.
I lost my granda to a stroke on October 16, 2008. I can not begin to express how much I loved her, for 32 years we shared a very close relationship. Grandma would call me everyday usually in the afternoon around 5 o’clock. I miss our daily conversations, and just knowing that she is at home messing around her house. I have cried many tears, and it is so hard to bring myself to to admit that she is truly gone. It was always a family ritual to have Sunday Dinner after Church at Grandma’s. My grandma loved and cared for me my entire life. I was the only grandkid to stand beside her coffin the entire time at the funeral home. She looked so beautiful and when I travel out to the cemetery now I still have a private conversation with her. I helped lead my grandma to make the descion to become a Christian. She now is in Heaven, waiting for me and my family!! God Bless you all, a you travel down this road. Please remember me in your prayers.
My granny passed in 1995.. and i am kind of used to she not being around.. but Suddenly since past 1 hr, I am missing her so much… that I cant control my tears. I wish rebirth exists, it will give me a chance to meet my grandparents… I am missing them terribly! And thinking of rebirth makes me little calm.
It’s good to know so many people around loved their grandmas..
Gosh, you guys, I’m so sorry I’m behind on the wonderful Grandma discussion here! I love that this post has brought us all here together to talk about our beloved grandmothers. I had a dream last night of my Grandmamom again – I believe she was visiting me for my birthday which is today, because, she knows I’m kind of depressed. See, she doesn’t always come to me in my dreams for my birthday – but, I’m fighting a bit of the blues and I think that’s why she came. It’s weird that I miss her so much more on my own birthday, but, I do – I wish I was going to the mailbox to look for cards from her and my other Grandma. They were both so awesome. It’s just that the one I wrote about – I grew up with in the same city. My Grandma Georgia lived in Denver and Grandmamom and I were in Dallas.
Like so many others I was brought here because I had searched “missing my grandma” And I just let my tears flow as I read your post.
I had a dream about her earlier and woke up as thoughts and memories flooded my mind. She was like a mother and a best friend to me! We were inseparable!
Your milk glass lamp is beautiful! My Gramma loved milk glass…I wish I had kept some of it.
She passed away almost 5 years ago….oh how I miss her so much.
Thanks for sharing your story it is comforting to know that there are so many others out there who love and adore their gramma’s…
OMG, I totally missed this comment! I’m so sorry, Chere! I’m so glad you found us all here, though – so many of us are so deeply attached to our sweet grandmas that have passed. They just had such an incredible impact on our lives, didn’t they? That is a bummer you don’t have any of her milk glass – but, I bet you do have something of hers, right? You can find some nice milk glass in antique shops and even in thrift stores. (There are loads of people that don’t like the stuff! LOL)
I let my grandmother’s kitchen stool go to another family member to whom it held no special meaning. And I would just about give up anything else I have of hers if I could have that stool back. I have asked about it a few times, but, I’m not sure I’ll get it. I’ve since been looking online for one similar – I have found a few that are almost what I’m looking for, but, you know what’s funny? The biggest thing I remember about that thing – the way it squeaked when you raised the seat up to make it a step stool. What are the odds I find one with that squeak? LOL!
I miss my grandma so much too. She died two years ago in september. She was the best women i ever knew. I love her so much. Sometimes I google I miss my Grandma, But this is the first time I saw this blog. My grandmas name is Clara Mae and she too had a train case. I have it. It is the color blue. I quess that is all i am going to type because I am having a rough nite. Thank you everyone for shareing=)
Thank you so much for commenting, Brandi! I’m in tears now as I respond to you….I would love to hear more about your grandma! Feel free to come back here and tell us more anytime!!! I’ll be thinking of you tonight! {{{{Brandi}}}}
Awesome post. I too had/have an awsome grandma who unconditionally loved my. I felt it in my bones. She was quite the wacky character herself. Makes me smile just writing this to you. But of course when the first two years after she passed away was pretty rough for me. Anyhow. A good grandma is hard to find and if you have one you are uber lucky to have her. Whoot Whoot!
RIP LOLA UDING.
JR – ‘feeling it in your bones’ – yep, yep, yep! That’s it exactly! And the super mega cool thing is that my grandma made my husband feel that way and his grandma made ME feel that way!!! And we just lost her last summer – I miss her so very much, too! I’ve had ideas spinning around in my head about making some kind of memorial about my two grandma’s and his grandma. I’m not really sure what I want it to be – but I’m thinking on it and I’ll definitely blog about it when I get it done! Thanks so much for visiting and commenting. This post has really become a wonderful community of grandkids who all dearly love their grandmas!! I just love it!
wow I miss mine too and same as above! i miss mine too!
Aw yeah, Grandma’s are just the best, huh, Brandy? Thanks so much for commenting!!
I googled “I miss my grandma” tonight sitting on the couch having a little pity party for myself. My nana died in October ’11, and when I saw this post I almost SWORE the first 4 sentences were written by me. The acceptance and unconditional love was unbelievable. Thanks for this great post, it doesn’t make me miss her less but definitely makes me feel a lot more excitement to someday dream connect with her, and ultimately see her again on another plane. I freakin’ love that milk lamp too. Totally a gramma thing.